Us Garage Estate Auction Sale people we are an odd rare breed. We can smell a sale in the air and we will get up before dawn if need be. Rain or shine, sleet or snow it don’t make no difference to us. Proper English isn’t a very high priority either. But that bright sparkley thing over there, now that’s a different story.
Please understand, most of us are not morning people. It’s just the disease saleology that we have. We are Drool-Prone and can salivate instantly at the sight of a newspaper or a garage-sale sign on the corner.
Disney Land to us is the Highway 127 Corridor. The World’s Longest Yard Sale, 450 miles of nothing but bargains and deals and sales and junk and sparkley things and Just Stuff.
Call that sale whatever you want, just call me when your going.
LET’S GO SALING!
A Find – Like hunting Easter Eggs, it’s a treasure
Antiques – Normally it’s more than a hundred years old. It can be a household item, a collectible or something valued because of it’s age.
As is – That object you have found that you don’t think you can live without. It’s yours with all of it’s chips, pings, dings, and cracks once you hand over your cash.
Bargain – A treasure you didn’t know you needed till you found it and it’s at a bargain.
Bargaining – An Olympic sport where the buyer and the seller engage in tactics to arrive at a mutually satisfactory price without coming in contact.
Barn Sale – Usually held in a barn or a large outbuilding on a farm. More than likely there will be large items. Farm tools, farm equipment, farm house furniture, gates, signs, chairs and then your normal assorted treasures.
Bicker – To argue with oneself cause you missed “a find” by staying to long at the previous sale.
Bid Box – Some higher priced items at estate and or tag sales will allow you to put a bid in for the final day.
Bloomin’ Onion – Served at Flea Markets, some auctions and it is Bloomin full of deep-fried calories. Something like 2,130 of them Bloomin’ calories.
Bluffing – Maybe I’m interested, maybe I’m not. Depends upon how good of a deal I can get.
Book Value – A reference book showing the value of an item.
Box Lot – A box full of unknown treasures. You pay one price, run home to see what treasure prize awaits you at the bottom.
Bragging Piece – “A find” at a Bargaining price
Cheese Fries – Served at Auctions, Flea Markets and they carry delightfully 3,010 artery-clogging calories.
Chigger Bite – A nick out of an item which can be felt
Collectibles – Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder
Collector – The beholder
Crazing – Sometimes you will find a crackled surface and think it’s a crack. It’s known as “alligatoring.” This is an effect within the glazes of pottery.
Dicker – To bargain
Disposophobia – The fear of getting rid of stuff. Yes it is true that someone’s junk is someone’s treasure.
Don’t know if it works – Probably does not
Drive-bys – Slowing down to check out the goods before stopping
Early Birds – If a sale starts at 7 A.M. we are the ones standing out in the pouring rain at 6:30 A.M.
Estate Sale – Supposed to mean someone has passed away or moved into their children’s home or a retirement home. Usually means “all” contents inside, outside home.
Everything Must Go – Usually means, it will go. It will go to you, the trash or wherever, but it aint coming back here.
Fanny Pack – A pouch around your waist to hold money and personal items so your hands are free to search and dig through boxes. They can also carry your treasures back to your car.
Flea Market – A place to rent a booth and sell your treasures. A place to hang-out and consume millions of calories and possible discover “a find”.
Garage Sale – Your own marketplace on your lawn, in your garage or in your home.
HTF – Hard to find
Janelle Elms – My genie in a bottle. http://www.osirockstars.com/patricia
Junk – Someone has gotten rid of their treasures cause now it’s junk.
MIB – Mint in box
MIJ – Made in Japan
Mint – In complete perfect condition
Museum sale – A sale with prices so high it seems they only want you to look and not buy
NBW – Never been worn
NIB – New in box
OSI Rock Stars – Like Disney Land only Success Land. http://www.osirockstars.com/patricia
Patina – Gives character to an item with it’s nicks, cracks, wear and tear derived from it’s age
Pickers – Also better known as the “middleman”. A shopper who buys and resells to dealers or other shops.
Pocketotomy – To cut, to dig into something. Bottom of pockets, purses, possible even the back seat looking for a little bit more change for that one of a kind item that you don’t even know what it is.
Repro – A reproduction of an item
Route – You’re an important person. I can’t move from here, I have a route. The route you have on weekends to find your treasures.
Saleology – The study of Sales of any nature. Garage, yard, Auction, Moving, Estate, Flea Market sales.
Saleopathy – The disease, the abnormality of “having” to attend all Sales.
Skunked – Getting up at 6 A.M. to travel your route only to not find a sale or not anything at any sales.
Sniper – In an auction you can be outbid by someone who swoops in with a last-minute bid.
Squatter – Someone who sets up in a flea-market or a highly trafficked area and they have not rented space.
Sticker Price – Just the asking price, not necessarily the final price
Tag sale – Bigger prices priced to move um out
The lot - Buying it all, the whole lot
Tire kicking – Testing, picking, plugging, poking and checking it out
Value – A fair price for one and all
Vultures – Worse than early birds. They are already sitting in front of your house with coffee and donuts waiting for the first light to come on.
Walletotomy – The same as Pocketotomy except this is your sweetie’s wallet and you are cutting into the budget.
Yard sale – A sale without the garage
